To add to last nights schpeel...as my thoughts on that subject continue..
-grief is a mourning of an actual loss, a perceived loss, or even of the potential of something that could have been.
This has made me think of when Katelyn passed on. We grieved our actual loss of a precious girl; we continue to grieve what could have been. Her friends are in university, are working, maintaining relationships, having children-and we think of what could have been.
To take this one step further....i will try to put into words what Roger's accident has implicated for us. We are so grateful that Rog survived, but in that, we grieve for the loss of life as we knew it. Rog is trying to emotionally come to terms, many times a day, of his loss of independence, and his ability to take care of himself and the people around him. We as a family are having to cope with changes in how we deal with him, care for him, and also try to give his as much independence as possible. We as a whole, in the back of our minds, are coping with the fear of what is to come. Yup, i said it. Everyone is thinking it and afraid to voice it-we are so afraid of the unknown. We all face unknowns daily, but we are worrying about it ahead of time, and now we are having to plan ahead for the future. Rog is improving, don't get me wrong. Thats the struggle with traumatic brain injury....there is no way to predict the outcomes-and we shall see where this road goes. The wonderful people at Rehab have encouraged us-yes, this was a severe head injury, but Rog had tremendous things going for him in the big picture-he is a very healthy and active mid-age male, with amazing family support, who has made tremendous positive strides in a very short time. So with that in mind, we work together as a family, friends, and a community-teamwork-to reach towards a goal of Rog once again becoming an independent and coping adult.
Those of you wishing an update on my dads medical issues-the AAA is holding its own, and his BP is maintaining at a good place. The pituitary tumor, assumed to be non-malignant, based on hormone/blood levels, is going to be treated with oral medication at this time, and hopefully within a few months we shall notice a shrinkage of that.
I feel like i just charted on a pt's chart.
Time to do some quick housework, mtg with Rog's rehab team, and then off to a hockey game-gonna be a GOOD day!
Spent the last week in Vegas with my wonderful spouse and some friends. A week of hanging out with various people, relaxing, eating good food, sight-seeing, walking the strip, shopping, and generally escaping from reality. It's so good to take a time out sometimes and recharge the battery!
